Muggle Love


I mean the idea of romance is absolutely stunning in its finest and rarest forms, but let's take a moment to be honest.

The amount of grace in my body is bordering absolute zero. It, actually, may currently be considered at a negative balance. 

Any sort of romantic inclination would send me into an immediate tizzy followed by some serious anxiety; I imagine there would be a fumble or two over an attempt at a sentence, and inevitably as I turned to walk as far away from the "romantic moment", I would walk directly into a wall...seriously. I have a real knack for finding walls and door frames at the most inopportune times, as if there is ever one. 

Now let's add a vase full of roses, a heart shaped box of mystery chocolates, and a sacrificial teddy bear to the situation above.

Welcome to Valentine's Day people!

For the most part, I have done well to avoid this holiday; mostly, because I am typically single, or I choose not to remind the "gentleman suitor" that "Doomsday V" is approaching. 

Let's take a moment to discuss the boyfriend. We shall call him "The Ninja". There is a backstory; I am sure we will get to it someday, but for today all we need to know is that he exists. He is not a figment of my imagination, and he is wonderful, except on Tuesdays...he is grumpy on Tuesdays.

"The Ninja" has been around for about ten months - we've been officially a couple for about eight. Not super long, not super short. Valentine's Day always brings out the awkwardness of a relationship. Let's then add in the fact that not only am I an awkward individual..."The Ninja" is sufficiently awkward as well.

People, we have a trifecta.

Never having been a couple that relishes in romance, I have often given him a hard time about our lack of pre-planned dates, my lack of receiving flowers, his lack of ooey-gooey-squishy-cuddliness (too much?), and so on...

Let's just go ahead and say that I want to live in a Garry Marshall movie, alright. He is no Garry Marshall.

Quite frankly, he is no Orlando Bloom or Edward Cullen; he is no Augustus Waters or The Doctor (10 of course!), and he is definitely no Han Solo...

He is even better. What we lack in romance we make up for in conversation and playfulness. Occasionally, he will look at me with the most intense stare, mostly because he is irritated, and I will stick my tongue out at him. Some days he just wants to scream...I find that this is the perfect opportunity to start skipping around the living room. Most days when I just want to curl up in a ball, he reminds me to laugh a little...the pain will fade. 

He is my Darcy. Cliche, yes I know, but it is simply the best example of a man who can simultaneously drive you absolutely mad with insanity and drive you to love in a way you could never have imagined. Sometimes, I can't even let the laughter settle away before I have to say "I love you" breathlessly, because I simply can't contain the feeling any longer. We have the best kind of love. Not the kind that deserves flowers and a sacrificial teddy bear one day a year, but a love that deserves an experience that sheds our awkwardness and allows us to enjoy each other. 

This year for Valentine's Day "The Ninja" and I are building the Millennium Falcon out of Legos. Every evening, after dinner, for the past week we have worked on the model that will eventually be mounted in the study of our home. I mean, for real. So much better than roses. Tonight, the evening of love, while most muggles will be waiting an hour or more for a table at an overpriced restaurant, "The Ninja" and I will be having a floor picnic in true Pretty Woman fashion (minus the hooker part, but is a Garry Marshall movie). The Falcon will be completed and we will be able to look at it every day and remember the week we spent laughing over the misplaced pieces and my uber need to color coordinate every single lego in the kit. 

Every. Single. One. 

We will be left with a week's worth of memories. By far the best part of this Valentine's Day is that I will be spending it with my Darcy and our awkwardness can just hang around, after all...

I'm pretty sure he won't even notice.


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